Growing Up in Judgement

Throughout my childhood, my physical appearance continued to change due to the many trends and people I surround myself with on a day to day basis. With so much pressure and judgment, I could not help to ride the popularity wave and try to be “cool”. To begin, my personal choice of clothing started the year going into kindergarten; I was ecstatic to meet new friends and show off my vast collection of star wars and power ranger shirts along with the classic brown Hurley t-shirt every boy that age happened to own. My hair was long and blonde from a summer free of responsibility and full of sun. My comfy athletic shoes built to withstand the strong rubber of a kickball were in their prime. However, as the stress free school year went on, lice spread through the school like wildfire. I was forced to buzz my luscious locks and leave my head nearly hairless. Although It was tragic, It opened the gate to the glorious texture a buzzed head consists. In fact, this buzz cut carried me all the way to the fourth grade. Fourth grade opened my eyes to something I had never experienced before, Judgement. Comments such as “where is your hair” and “How are you bald already” pushed me to the edge until I could not withstand the criticism any longer. After four great years, I put the buzz cut to rest. In a couple years, the summer after 5th grade came to an end and it was time to go back to school shopping. As I was deciding what new pair of kicks would make a statement on the first day of school, my older brother introduced me to a whole new world, vans. For the first time in a while, I had hopped on the bandwagon and politely asked my mom to purchase my first pair of vans. The shoes were uncomfortable and heavy, but at least I fit in. Out of the three years, 8th grade was the worst due to the new and never ending trend of vaping. This new accessory everyone had to have to be “cool” happened to hit my closest friends. Thankfully, as my friends said, I was too much of a “goody goody” to even dare try it. This stupid trend caused me to grow apart from my closest friends and to hang out with fellow goody goodies. To be honest, looking back on it now, middle school taught me that trying to be someone you’re not ultimately sucks in the long run. Vaping destroyed my relationships and harmed so many people I cared about. Finally, so far my high school experience has not been too bad, of course aside from the strong scent of mango pod smoke my lungs intake when trying to use the restroom. Highschool is a killer. Nowadays phones and social media take one wrong choice and blows up an innocent kid’s life. Today I can’t hang out with three quarters of the my so called friends. They lie and hide things from me assuming I would “snitch” on them. I try to help but eventually helping idiots gets difficult and I have my own life to worry about. Looking back at it all, changing yourself and doing bad things as a kid to fit in with the “cool” people can only hurt you in the future.

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